The "What-Ifs"

Throughout the past couple of weeks, I have had a lot of "what-ifs".

So what exactly is a "what-if"?

A "what-if" is something that we worry about. What if if I can't come up with the money? What if I can't make rent? What if my car doesn't make it? Etc, etc, etc..

It can be something we are anticipating, worrying about, or just thinking about. But one thing for sure-it can test our faith in the Lord.

Because I am a HUGE planner, I struggle with not knowing what's going on at times. This is something I have worked on over the past year, and I am STILL working on it. It's definitely a work in progress but at times I still fail. Lucky for me though, God NEVER fails.

As I checked my school email tonight (as I do every night), I received an email stating my financial aid award letter was ready to be accessed. So I logged on to e-services, opened my letter, and looked at the screen.

Not exactly what I was hoping for.

Turns out I have to cover a lot more than I expected. Although I am working a lot, I was planning on putting that money away for something else, but I know the Lord will provide. He has NEVER failed me, not once, and I know He never will. So I began my drive back home and was listening to a CD of worship songs. The song "Your Love Never Fails" came on and I thought it was perfect. The lyrics described my feelings. I love those "God moments".

Another "what-if" I have been facing is about my car. For those of you who have had the privilege of riding in my car (Ha, who am I kidding!?), it pretty much sounds like it is going to die or explode-you choose which one comes first. The tires have to be filled up every three days because they are so bad, my gas mileage is horrible, no A/C, and a bunch of other little things are wrong. Not knowing when my car is going to die on me worries me a lot. I don't know if it's going to make it throughout the school year. And if it doesn't, what's my Plan B? I am a commuter. I live 15 minutes away from my school. Not having that control over something I heavily depend on does not help my situation at all.

But I am still thankful for my car.

As I was sitting on my balcony tonight, I opened my Bible to 1 Corinthians. I have been reading through this book for about 2 weeks now and have been amazed at what the Lord has taught me. As I was reading through Chapter 4, one of the last verses really hit home.

For the kingdom of God does not consist in talk but in power.

1 Corinthians 4:20

Wow. Talk about a huge conviction. When I read this verse, it reminded me of God's power and how it is not just promised, but shown in so many ways throughout our lives. The Bible is full of so many promises and they are not just talk. God isn't going to promise us one thing and then bail on us.

He is the God of the universe. Our Creator. Father. And He knows us better than we know ourselves.

So with all these "what-ifs" in my life I must remember who I put my trust in. A God who is faithful, unfailing, and all knowing-that's better than anything in this life.

With Blessings,

     Heather